1 00:00:04,010 --> 00:00:05,010 Thank you. 2 00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:50,340 I can be so good for you. 3 00:00:52,020 --> 00:00:54,280 Love you like you want me to. 4 00:00:57,040 --> 00:01:02,680 I can be so good for you. 5 00:01:04,379 --> 00:01:06,760 Love you like you want me to. 6 00:01:36,780 --> 00:01:40,420 Here's a special announcement for the owner and rider of number two, Lily Law. 7 00:01:40,980 --> 00:01:44,020 Will you make your way to the parade ring as soon as possible? 8 00:02:14,140 --> 00:02:15,860 I don't know what I'm doing here. 9 00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:18,240 I could be doing other things, you know. 10 00:02:18,780 --> 00:02:19,780 The dogs. 11 00:02:20,280 --> 00:02:21,440 Hackney. Dogs? 12 00:02:21,920 --> 00:02:23,360 Terry, this is where it's at. 13 00:02:24,020 --> 00:02:25,240 Your own county set. 14 00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:26,560 The Mark Phillips lot. 15 00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:28,440 Contacts, isn't it? 16 00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:29,980 Combined business with pleasure. 17 00:02:30,860 --> 00:02:32,800 I've got a smashing lance here I'm trying to unload. 18 00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:36,760 1979 logbook. Only 14 ,000 o 'clock. 19 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:38,480 Not a trace of rust. 20 00:02:39,140 --> 00:02:41,200 Got a bomb with a chin. It's wonderful, I should think. 21 00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:44,040 God, I smell the affluence. 22 00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:45,900 You don't get that at Hackney, dog track. 23 00:02:47,260 --> 00:02:48,720 Now, it's done. 24 00:02:49,460 --> 00:02:50,800 You're standing in it. 25 00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:03,820 Declarations for the next race, the adjacent post -maison race, close in ten 26 00:03:03,820 --> 00:03:04,820 minutes' time. 27 00:03:17,460 --> 00:03:18,460 That's my one. 28 00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:20,400 It's got a bent on it. So? 29 00:03:21,060 --> 00:03:22,420 Wouldn't say no to her either, is it? 30 00:03:22,780 --> 00:03:23,780 Lily Law? 31 00:03:24,640 --> 00:03:28,360 You can't fancy that. What's with a name like that? You of all people. 32 00:03:28,920 --> 00:03:29,920 I fancy it. 33 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:33,940 No chance. No chance at all. Look at his legs. 34 00:03:34,220 --> 00:03:35,360 Look at his iron quarters. 35 00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:38,860 What are you going on about as principal? 36 00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:42,340 Want to stick them once on its nose, not give it one? Yeah, stick a fibre on the 37 00:03:42,340 --> 00:03:43,340 other grape for me. 38 00:03:44,080 --> 00:03:46,040 Be advised, Terry. Stand on me. 39 00:03:46,700 --> 00:03:47,700 Lily law. 40 00:04:01,809 --> 00:04:03,350 Here you go, seven quid on spring return. 41 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:06,810 £28 for seven spring return, ticket number 301. 42 00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:12,110 Excuse me. 43 00:04:14,810 --> 00:04:15,810 There you go. 44 00:04:15,950 --> 00:04:16,950 Four to one. 45 00:04:16,970 --> 00:04:17,970 Four to one? 46 00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:19,050 He must have seen you coming. 47 00:04:19,610 --> 00:04:21,350 So many others added, there's seven to two. 48 00:04:22,730 --> 00:04:23,730 Do it yourself. 49 00:04:24,070 --> 00:04:25,070 Couple of quid, yeah. 50 00:04:39,050 --> 00:04:41,790 Now just walk up, slowly, slowly. 51 00:04:43,550 --> 00:04:44,830 Slowly on the line. 52 00:04:45,650 --> 00:04:49,070 They're under starter's orders, and they're off for the open race. 53 00:04:49,370 --> 00:04:52,970 They're settling down, going to the first. Lily Law goes into the lead. 54 00:04:53,190 --> 00:04:55,510 And at the rear, spring return has started slowly. 55 00:04:55,810 --> 00:05:00,030 Lily Law clear in the lead. Phone bill, lantern and fly exchange. I'm on my 56 00:05:00,030 --> 00:05:01,030 side. Come on, Billy. 57 00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:11,840 Bugger's balked at the first. Billy Law goes clear, going to the second. 58 00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:16,020 And on the run -in, it's Billy Law winning easily from flying stations and 59 00:05:16,020 --> 00:05:17,020 bills. 60 00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:19,620 Here is the result of the open race. 61 00:05:20,180 --> 00:05:23,620 The one I fancy picked it. That's always been your problem, Terry, hasn't it? 62 00:05:23,660 --> 00:05:24,499 What has? 63 00:05:24,500 --> 00:05:26,160 Tethering about, chopping and changing. 64 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:29,360 What's known in the psychiatric profession as a grasshopper mind. 65 00:05:29,980 --> 00:05:32,100 In the good old days, you could get treatment for it. 66 00:05:32,380 --> 00:05:36,260 Pelmanism. If you have a fancy, a feeling in your water, stick to it. 67 00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:39,640 But it was you who talked me out of it. That's the point I'm trying to make, 68 00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:40,760 isn't it? You shouldn't have listened to me. 69 00:05:40,980 --> 00:05:42,880 You've got to be strong -willed in this world, Terry. 70 00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:44,600 Implacable, like me. 71 00:05:45,060 --> 00:05:46,940 Now, come on, twist me arm and take me for a drink. 72 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:57,160 Listen, if you're going point to point again, let me know. 73 00:05:57,560 --> 00:05:58,660 I'll arrange to be busy. 74 00:06:02,700 --> 00:06:03,700 Hang about, Terry. 75 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:05,500 We may have done our bread. 76 00:06:06,410 --> 00:06:08,210 But maybe it's only cast on the waters. 77 00:06:08,570 --> 00:06:09,570 Eh? 78 00:06:09,750 --> 00:06:12,830 Clock the keys in the wind in the willow's waistcoat and snap your felt 79 00:06:12,830 --> 00:06:13,830 there. 80 00:06:16,010 --> 00:06:17,130 That's Watson Everett. 81 00:06:17,630 --> 00:06:19,170 Who? Watson Everett. 82 00:06:19,690 --> 00:06:23,250 Stroll on. Come in, Terry. He's only one of your genuine NH trainers. 83 00:06:23,490 --> 00:06:24,490 He's not rubbish. 84 00:06:24,510 --> 00:06:28,070 Hey, that old bloke has got a couple of jumpers with him. 85 00:06:28,930 --> 00:06:31,050 The Honourable Jeremy Burnham -Jones. 86 00:06:32,110 --> 00:06:33,810 He's swallowed the yuzu or something. 87 00:06:34,419 --> 00:06:38,080 What's the Jeremy Burnham Jones when it's at home? It's compact, isn't it, 88 00:06:38,100 --> 00:06:40,860 Terry? Only one of your bright and true blue jet set. 89 00:06:41,460 --> 00:06:43,400 Everly into antique commemorative pottery. 90 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,280 I'd forgotten he was also everly into GGs. 91 00:06:46,860 --> 00:06:50,880 So what good's that going to do us? Because, Terry, as well as being everly 92 00:06:50,880 --> 00:06:54,940 GGs, I am not entirely disassociated with antique statue work. 93 00:06:55,900 --> 00:06:56,900 Since when? 94 00:06:57,540 --> 00:06:59,440 Subsequent to a favour I did a geezer yesterday. 95 00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:04,180 Antiques? That's who we're used to. 96 00:07:04,420 --> 00:07:05,420 Why not? 97 00:07:06,280 --> 00:07:08,280 Is there anything you're not into? 98 00:07:09,100 --> 00:07:10,640 Yeah, there's one or two things. 99 00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:13,100 Still, you never know your luck. 100 00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:14,600 An 101 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:21,440 honest 102 00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:23,780 opinion. A connoisseur's assessment. 103 00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:25,360 Me? 104 00:07:26,100 --> 00:07:27,100 You. 105 00:07:27,420 --> 00:07:28,660 What it's worth, you mean? 106 00:07:28,900 --> 00:07:29,900 Yeah. 107 00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:38,660 Well, for a start, is it nicked? 108 00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:40,480 Terry. 109 00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:44,420 It's old, isn't it? Yeah, mid -19th century, yeah. 110 00:07:45,140 --> 00:07:46,260 Well, it's an ornament. 111 00:07:46,580 --> 00:07:47,700 It's a statue. 112 00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:49,920 It's a geezer. 113 00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:52,680 I don't think Arthur Nevis could have nailed it better. 114 00:07:53,020 --> 00:07:54,120 It's China, Terry. 115 00:07:54,340 --> 00:07:55,299 Is it? 116 00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:58,080 You ain't got slant eyes. Not Chinese China. 117 00:07:58,360 --> 00:08:00,560 Not bamboo shoots and prawn ball China. 118 00:08:01,780 --> 00:08:02,780 Staffordshire China. 119 00:08:02,940 --> 00:08:08,420 Oh. A fine, unrecorded Staffordshire figure holding a book and resting his 120 00:08:08,420 --> 00:08:13,320 on a pedestal. That is how your bona fide art world auctioneer will classify 121 00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:14,480 It's Milton. 122 00:08:15,100 --> 00:08:16,100 Milton who? 123 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,720 Milton. The false teeth merchant? 124 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,160 The poet Milton. 125 00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:22,560 Paradise lost, paradise got back, all that. 126 00:08:22,840 --> 00:08:24,520 Go on, go on. Put a price on it. 127 00:08:25,980 --> 00:08:27,680 Yeah, but am I buying or selling? 128 00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:32,400 To the punter, what you are holding, Terry, is worth 80 quid. 129 00:08:32,700 --> 00:08:33,740 95, top whack. 130 00:08:34,559 --> 00:08:35,559 Is it really? 131 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:37,659 Yeah, it's nice, isn't it? 132 00:08:38,419 --> 00:08:39,419 Handsome. 133 00:08:39,880 --> 00:08:40,960 Bet you wish you had 100. 134 00:08:43,220 --> 00:08:44,220 Too gross. 135 00:08:45,300 --> 00:08:46,300 God, blimey! 136 00:08:47,460 --> 00:08:50,700 Fakes! They are 100 % genuine reproductions. 137 00:08:51,100 --> 00:08:53,980 Well, you're holding then, aren't you, son? All you need now is some punter to 138 00:08:53,980 --> 00:08:54,980 get rid of them for you. 139 00:08:55,300 --> 00:08:58,320 That is where my friend Jeremy Burnham -Jones comes in. 140 00:08:59,100 --> 00:09:01,440 What, a geezer from Brighton who's into pottery and horses? 141 00:09:02,380 --> 00:09:04,780 Context, Terry. That is what life is all about. 142 00:09:05,060 --> 00:09:06,140 I've been on a blowout to him. 143 00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:09,100 He does me a favour, I do him a favour in return. 144 00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:10,440 Oh, yeah? 145 00:09:10,740 --> 00:09:12,420 And what favour are you doing him? 146 00:09:14,620 --> 00:09:18,040 Oh, be fair, Arthur. I mean, credit where credit's due. 147 00:09:18,340 --> 00:09:20,960 Your average punter is not going to stand for it. 148 00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:25,200 Terry, your average punter is going to stand what he's told to stand for 149 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:26,860 your average punter is a mug. 150 00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:29,480 All right, all right, I won't argue with that. 151 00:09:29,840 --> 00:09:31,340 Your average punter is a mutt. 152 00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:33,580 But he's not a bleeding lunatic, is he? 153 00:09:34,220 --> 00:09:35,220 How come? 154 00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:40,760 Look, your average punter is not going to lob out 85 or 90 sobs on 155 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:45,840 an antique Staffordshire statue that was manufactured by a factory full of 156 00:09:45,840 --> 00:09:49,380 Pakistanis round the back of Orient football ground, are they? Think not. 157 00:09:50,260 --> 00:09:51,260 No, Arthur. 158 00:09:51,940 --> 00:09:52,940 Highbury may be. 159 00:09:53,220 --> 00:09:54,220 Orient, no. 160 00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:58,980 Terry, I'll mark your card of your average punter for you. He goes into an 161 00:09:58,980 --> 00:10:02,180 antique shop, picks up a little piece of pottery. He's got a sticker on its 162 00:10:02,180 --> 00:10:03,580 bottom saying 350. 163 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:07,380 He is astute enough to know a piece of rubbish when it's put in front of him. 164 00:10:07,500 --> 00:10:09,640 Vodka and tonic. No, only light ales. 165 00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:11,440 Two light ales, then. 166 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:17,880 If, contrary -wise, the sticker says 90 nicker, he knows enough about the 167 00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:20,880 subject to know a bargain when it's put in front of him. 168 00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:24,420 Hello, hello, hello, says your Mr. Average Nice Guy Punder. 169 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,960 90 nikka, this can't be rubbish. 170 00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:29,280 Ipso facto, we got a result, Terry. 171 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:30,520 £1 .60. 172 00:10:34,220 --> 00:10:38,340 298 times 90 is... No, no, no, it's not all profit, Terry. 173 00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:40,560 They are genuine reproductions. 174 00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:43,680 Pakistani craftsmen are no Pakistani craftsmen. Oh, yeah. 175 00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:49,040 It cost me six quid apiece. And there's overheads, travelling exits... Meals. 176 00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:50,200 Exactly. 177 00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:54,160 And what little I do come out on top with. I've got to split down the middle, 178 00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:55,220 haven't I? 179 00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:01,840 And Jeremy Burnham, what's he going to want? A cup of coffee, isn't he? 180 00:11:02,420 --> 00:11:03,420 Sad, but true. 181 00:11:03,940 --> 00:11:06,360 But life isn't just material possessions, Terry. 182 00:11:07,460 --> 00:11:09,220 Do you know what life is really all about? 183 00:11:10,140 --> 00:11:11,140 Contacts. Right. 184 00:11:11,760 --> 00:11:13,920 Brighton is Mecca for your antique tourist punter. 185 00:11:14,360 --> 00:11:15,660 Jeremy has friends at court. 186 00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:18,760 What I was thinking, what keeps going through my mind is... 187 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:23,560 While you're buzzing around all these antique mortars, what am I going to be 188 00:11:23,560 --> 00:11:24,560 doing? 189 00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:27,880 I'm not surprised they turned it in, you know. 190 00:11:28,380 --> 00:11:30,540 Your theatrical night. Shut up, market lot. 191 00:11:31,060 --> 00:11:32,060 Turn what in? 192 00:11:32,780 --> 00:11:35,380 Commuting. London to Brighton. Brighton to London. 193 00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:36,640 Regulars, clockwork. 194 00:11:37,700 --> 00:11:38,700 Boy, it was elbow. 195 00:11:39,020 --> 00:11:40,020 What was elbow? 196 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:41,520 Brighton Bell. 197 00:11:42,680 --> 00:11:43,680 Champagne and kippers. 198 00:11:43,900 --> 00:11:44,960 They all did it. 199 00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:48,760 Johnny Gilgall, Ralphie Richardson, David Sexton. 200 00:11:49,700 --> 00:11:53,680 Every morning of the week, we had Pullman cars then. 201 00:11:54,040 --> 00:11:55,560 They had vintage cars and all, didn't they? 202 00:11:56,080 --> 00:11:57,080 London and Brighton. 203 00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:04,720 I mean, can you see Johnny Gielgud, Sir Johnny Gielgud, no less, with his light 204 00:12:04,720 --> 00:12:08,160 ale slopping around in his plastic beaker while he's stuffing individual 205 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:09,340 pie into his North and South? 206 00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:11,100 Not on either, mate. 207 00:12:11,340 --> 00:12:14,340 What, sitting here like this? He wouldn't stand for it. 208 00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:16,740 You know what I keep thinking is... 209 00:12:17,640 --> 00:12:19,000 Why do you need the heavy brigade? 210 00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:21,040 Heavy brigade? 211 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:22,400 Yours truly. 212 00:12:22,860 --> 00:12:25,200 Who down there needs leaning on? 213 00:12:26,700 --> 00:12:30,800 Nobody. A little seaside trip for you, isn't it? Fresh air, all that. 214 00:12:31,180 --> 00:12:32,180 Put money on it? 215 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:33,960 Much as you like, my son. 216 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,160 You'll find you're on a loser. 217 00:12:55,300 --> 00:12:56,300 Yes, that was great. 218 00:12:56,800 --> 00:13:00,320 He worked well on the bridle over six furlongs. He'll be there in time for 219 00:13:00,320 --> 00:13:03,460 plumbing. He'll be all right in time for the race, all right. No fear in that 220 00:13:03,460 --> 00:13:05,020 score. Yes, Governor. 221 00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:06,640 Make sure he's done it properly. 222 00:13:07,100 --> 00:13:08,980 Right. I did that right enough. 223 00:13:37,490 --> 00:13:40,890 19th century commemorative Staffordshire equestrian figure you've got there, 224 00:13:40,910 --> 00:13:43,070 Terry. Birth of Bob or two, I can tell you that. 225 00:13:43,570 --> 00:13:44,950 Well, more than milk. What? 226 00:13:45,490 --> 00:13:48,830 Your pottery equestrian's a different class, your pottery poet, isn't he? I 227 00:13:48,830 --> 00:13:51,910 mean, that's really kosher. You're into the ton and a half club there, I should 228 00:13:51,910 --> 00:13:52,950 say. Really? Yeah. 229 00:13:53,590 --> 00:13:57,870 Rather more than that, aren't I? Yes. Hello, Jeremy. How nice to see you 230 00:13:58,830 --> 00:13:59,830 Thank you. 231 00:14:00,650 --> 00:14:05,130 So this is the friend you were telling me about, Arthur? Yeah, Terence McCann, 232 00:14:05,250 --> 00:14:07,070 the Honourable Jeremy Burnham Jones. 233 00:14:08,090 --> 00:14:09,210 Nice place to meet you. 234 00:14:09,630 --> 00:14:10,630 Hello, Terence. 235 00:14:11,370 --> 00:14:12,490 You're like the archer. 236 00:14:13,250 --> 00:14:14,250 The what? 237 00:14:15,130 --> 00:14:18,850 The Fred Archer, Mr McCann. He rode over 2 ,750 winners. 238 00:14:20,190 --> 00:14:26,130 Six ledgers, five derbies, four Oaks, 2 ,000 guineas four times, 1 ,000 guineas 239 00:14:26,130 --> 00:14:28,130 twice. Greatest pep war. 240 00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:30,400 You haven't heard of him? 241 00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:32,340 No, it's not up my street. 242 00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:35,340 No, no, it's not his strongest subject, a history of the turf, Jeremy. 243 00:14:35,660 --> 00:14:37,840 Now, that, that's more like it, isn't it? What? 244 00:14:41,220 --> 00:14:46,060 Martha McGrath, winner of the Brownlow, Starris Brick and Douglas Cup. 245 00:14:46,300 --> 00:14:49,180 The only dog ever to win the Waterloo three times. 246 00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:51,500 Hardly the sport of kings. 247 00:14:53,220 --> 00:14:54,720 How about queens, Jeremy? 248 00:14:57,580 --> 00:14:58,580 Royal command. 249 00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:00,780 was presented to Queen Victoria at court. 250 00:15:02,060 --> 00:15:03,780 He will have his little joke. 251 00:15:04,660 --> 00:15:08,280 And all the same, one hopes that Mr McCann will prove rather better than 252 00:15:08,280 --> 00:15:09,940 when it comes to earning his keep. 253 00:15:11,100 --> 00:15:12,220 I want a word with you. 254 00:15:12,580 --> 00:15:13,539 Yeah, of course. 255 00:15:13,540 --> 00:15:14,540 Outside. 256 00:15:16,180 --> 00:15:17,180 Don't worry, Jeremy. 257 00:15:17,980 --> 00:15:19,980 Underneath all that, solid gold. 258 00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:21,900 All that glitters, Arthur. 259 00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:23,120 Exactly. 260 00:15:26,270 --> 00:15:29,570 Since when have I been on his payroll? I was going to tell you, Terry, but I was 261 00:15:29,570 --> 00:15:32,250 just waiting for the opportune moment, you know. Like now? 262 00:15:32,490 --> 00:15:36,830 Yeah, well, look, as I explained to you, Jeremy is doing me a favour, apropos 263 00:15:36,830 --> 00:15:37,829 the milks, right? 264 00:15:37,830 --> 00:15:42,590 Yeah, all right, yeah. And I, in return, and by courtesy of you, am doing him a 265 00:15:42,590 --> 00:15:43,590 favour back. 266 00:15:43,790 --> 00:15:47,250 What sort of favour? No, no, don't lose your bottle. Nothing big, nothing you 267 00:15:47,250 --> 00:15:48,250 haven't handled before. 268 00:15:48,650 --> 00:15:51,770 Sort of, um, watchdogging type of thing, you know. 269 00:15:52,870 --> 00:15:54,310 What sort of watchdogging? 270 00:15:56,580 --> 00:15:59,500 Well, watch all things, really. I mean, to be absolutely clinical. 271 00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:05,200 Me? Sleeping there? 272 00:16:05,480 --> 00:16:06,480 Leaving out? 273 00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:08,880 Terry! No, no, no, it's not nice, is it? 274 00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:10,500 What do you mean, it's not nice? 275 00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:13,440 Me, keeping down with a bleeding neck. 276 00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:15,700 No, I'm sorry, mate, it's not on. 277 00:16:15,980 --> 00:16:17,600 Terry, this is the countryside. 278 00:16:17,860 --> 00:16:19,200 This is your great outdoors. 279 00:16:19,900 --> 00:16:23,060 Look, you could be sitting behind a desk in a solo club. 280 00:16:23,689 --> 00:16:25,950 Breathing in all that ciggy smoke and all that rubbish. 281 00:16:26,810 --> 00:16:30,390 Grappling with legless marauders from Man United's far -flung legions. 282 00:16:30,790 --> 00:16:31,790 Having aggro. 283 00:16:31,970 --> 00:16:33,230 This is Shangri -La. 284 00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:54,220 No, Alfred, it's not on. 285 00:16:55,380 --> 00:16:55,979 Don't mean. 286 00:16:55,980 --> 00:16:57,560 Even the old pals act as its limit. 287 00:16:57,820 --> 00:17:00,120 Yeah, but it's only for a few days. Just put it on. 288 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:01,700 Make sure you don't get lobbled. 289 00:17:01,940 --> 00:17:03,740 I'm not pipping on straw, Finito. 290 00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:06,540 That was good enough for our saviour, Terry. 291 00:17:06,819 --> 00:17:08,760 But you wouldn't have to be kipping down on the straw, Patrick. 292 00:17:09,119 --> 00:17:10,119 We've an armchair. 293 00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:11,619 Especially for that specific purpose. 294 00:17:12,099 --> 00:17:14,560 They've got an armchair? Well, that's terrific, isn't it? I'll tell you what, 295 00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:18,359 Paddy. You get your head down. Go on, be my guest. You sleep with Pelman. I 296 00:17:18,359 --> 00:17:19,309 mean, Pelman! 297 00:17:19,310 --> 00:17:20,970 What's wrong with Pelmet for a name? 298 00:17:21,369 --> 00:17:25,810 Nothing on a curtain rail. Listen, you, there is no way I'm going case with 299 00:17:25,810 --> 00:17:27,790 several hundredweight of unprocessed dog mates. 300 00:17:28,310 --> 00:17:30,590 That is one of the country's foremost chasers. 301 00:17:30,950 --> 00:17:31,950 No, Arthur. 302 00:17:32,590 --> 00:17:35,150 Well, if you want to, Patrick, there's always them that will. 303 00:17:35,510 --> 00:17:36,790 Yeah, well, you'd better get hold of them. 304 00:17:36,990 --> 00:17:40,070 Listen, wouldn't it be the first time that a stable after Stuttgart all night 305 00:17:40,070 --> 00:17:41,070 lying down with the racehorse? 306 00:17:41,910 --> 00:17:42,910 A bird? Yeah. 307 00:17:44,170 --> 00:17:45,270 The mind boggles, doesn't it? 308 00:17:45,710 --> 00:17:48,370 I mean, what sort of scruffy scrubber have you got to get who's going to sleep 309 00:17:48,370 --> 00:17:49,430 with a horse in a stable, eh? 310 00:17:49,790 --> 00:17:50,790 Hello. 311 00:17:51,430 --> 00:17:52,930 I'm Jocelyn Maxwell Saunders. 312 00:17:53,590 --> 00:17:54,970 Oh, I'm Arthur Edward Daly. 313 00:17:55,350 --> 00:17:58,950 Oh, you must be the good Samaritan who's volunteered to give a watchful eye on 314 00:17:58,950 --> 00:17:59,609 this chap. 315 00:17:59,610 --> 00:18:01,510 Um, well, no, actually. 316 00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:03,710 No, it's, uh, it's me. 317 00:18:04,850 --> 00:18:06,290 Terry McCann. Oh, hello. 318 00:18:06,730 --> 00:18:08,170 It really is awfully kind of you. 319 00:18:09,330 --> 00:18:11,010 Absolutely. Any friend of Arthur? 320 00:18:11,310 --> 00:18:12,750 We're awfully grateful, Pell and I. 321 00:18:13,070 --> 00:18:14,070 Pell's his stable name. 322 00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:15,780 I'm riding him next week. 323 00:18:16,420 --> 00:18:17,420 I'm Rita. 324 00:18:17,580 --> 00:18:20,520 I was going to get landed with the job of spending me nights in there, so 325 00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:21,660 done me a right good favour. 326 00:18:21,920 --> 00:18:23,880 I've given up all hope of getting any beauty sleep. 327 00:18:25,220 --> 00:18:27,120 Yeah, well, your need is great. 328 00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:28,279 Any road. 329 00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:31,140 If there's anything I can do for you, you only have to ask. 330 00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:34,520 No, I'll do my utmost not to be a bother. 331 00:19:27,670 --> 00:19:28,890 You're a tough you are. 332 00:19:31,890 --> 00:19:33,330 God, dear Lord. 333 00:19:34,670 --> 00:19:36,230 Oh, that's nice, isn't it? 334 00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:58,200 I'd never do that again. I mean, why couldn't you knock? 335 00:19:58,420 --> 00:20:00,800 I didn't like to knock. I thought you might have had your head down. 336 00:20:01,180 --> 00:20:02,500 Only it fetched you a cup of cocoa. 337 00:20:03,740 --> 00:20:04,740 Oh, Tom. 338 00:20:05,180 --> 00:20:06,180 Do you take sugar? 339 00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:07,440 No, no. 340 00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:08,480 Oh, I thought you would. 341 00:20:08,860 --> 00:20:09,920 You look as if you do. 342 00:20:10,860 --> 00:20:12,360 Only you've put three spoonfuls in. 343 00:20:13,860 --> 00:20:15,440 Well, I won't stir it then, eh? 344 00:20:16,760 --> 00:20:18,360 Nothing else you want? 345 00:20:19,580 --> 00:20:20,580 No, no. 346 00:20:21,240 --> 00:20:22,240 Oh. 347 00:20:22,420 --> 00:20:23,420 Right. 348 00:20:23,840 --> 00:20:25,080 Well, I'll say goodnight then, Terry. 349 00:20:28,270 --> 00:20:29,430 Okay. Good night then, Terry. 350 00:21:20,620 --> 00:21:22,220 It could do with a cork up your bum. 351 00:21:23,020 --> 00:21:25,840 Work day today, Rita. As soon as you can. Let's have them tacked up early. 352 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:31,440 Morning, Parrish. 353 00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:32,560 Have a nice night. 354 00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:34,200 Perfect. 355 00:21:34,680 --> 00:21:35,800 Oi, Paddy. 356 00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:37,279 Yes, Patrick. 357 00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:38,560 I want a wash and a shave. 358 00:21:38,920 --> 00:21:41,620 Well, you're easily taken care of. There's a standpipe right behind me. 359 00:21:42,320 --> 00:21:43,320 Well, no hot water. 360 00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:44,520 No hot water. 361 00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:45,980 How do you shave, then? 362 00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:47,280 Electric razor. 363 00:21:47,540 --> 00:21:48,459 That's what I've got. 364 00:21:48,460 --> 00:21:49,460 Where do you plug it in? 365 00:21:49,850 --> 00:21:50,850 I didn't plug it in. 366 00:21:51,350 --> 00:21:52,350 Works on a battery. 367 00:21:56,190 --> 00:21:57,190 Morning. 368 00:21:57,270 --> 00:21:58,350 Oh, morning, Josh. 369 00:21:59,090 --> 00:22:00,090 Morning. Morning. 370 00:22:02,830 --> 00:22:04,770 Any chance of a cup of tea or something? 371 00:22:05,150 --> 00:22:08,630 Oh, there was a cup of tea for them that was up in time for it, but there'll be 372 00:22:08,630 --> 00:22:09,630 nothing there till after the gallops. 373 00:22:10,810 --> 00:22:11,810 What, no breakfast? 374 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:35,920 Morning, Miltons. 375 00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:13,240 It's funny. 376 00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:14,400 What's that? 377 00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:19,600 Well, don't make it obvious, but if you look to your right, I keep seeing 378 00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:21,100 something glint in those trees. 379 00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:25,400 Can't see anything? 380 00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:29,500 No, you're right, it's gone. 381 00:23:30,340 --> 00:23:31,340 Probably not important. 382 00:23:33,140 --> 00:23:34,140 No, maybe not. 383 00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:36,280 Possibly kids from the village fooling around. 384 00:23:38,140 --> 00:23:39,840 It's a bit early in the day for kids, isn't it? 385 00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,720 Anyway, they're always on the go, aren't they? Always dodging about. 386 00:23:43,740 --> 00:23:46,540 That's the third time I've seen something in the same place in the last 387 00:23:46,540 --> 00:23:47,540 minutes. 388 00:23:48,540 --> 00:23:50,080 Do you think someone's trying to novel Pell? 389 00:23:50,860 --> 00:23:51,860 What do you think? 390 00:23:52,980 --> 00:23:54,540 All things are possible, as the poet said. 391 00:23:55,100 --> 00:23:55,879 What poet? 392 00:23:55,880 --> 00:23:56,880 Milton? 393 00:23:58,060 --> 00:23:59,720 Don't you think you ought to stroll up there and take a look? 394 00:24:00,140 --> 00:24:01,140 No, no, no. 395 00:24:01,780 --> 00:24:04,860 No, if he sees me coming, he'll just leg it somewhere else, won't he? He'll also 396 00:24:04,860 --> 00:24:05,980 know I know where he is. 397 00:24:06,740 --> 00:24:07,740 No. 398 00:24:07,750 --> 00:24:10,930 Always allow the enemy to believe he's two moves ahead, right? 399 00:24:11,350 --> 00:24:13,330 But always be one move ahead of him. 400 00:24:13,610 --> 00:24:14,610 Who said that? 401 00:24:15,130 --> 00:24:16,130 Certainly not Milton. 402 00:24:17,510 --> 00:24:18,510 Wellington at Waterloo? 403 00:24:18,770 --> 00:24:19,770 No. 404 00:24:20,050 --> 00:24:21,050 Alexander at Elyria? 405 00:24:21,270 --> 00:24:22,270 No. 406 00:24:23,150 --> 00:24:24,150 Jules C. Scott. 407 00:24:25,910 --> 00:24:28,630 John, give me a rub over. Lay him down, will you? 408 00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:39,000 Hey, I'll give you odds you've never done a day's work like this before. 409 00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:41,300 Hmm? Being a bodyguard to a Gigi. 410 00:24:42,500 --> 00:24:44,540 Look, I spent a fortnight once. It was Christmas. 411 00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:47,840 Being nursemaid to a load of residents of a turkey call. Oh. 412 00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:50,600 They're not very much alike, though, I wouldn't think. 413 00:24:50,940 --> 00:24:52,620 They're not turkeys and racehorses. 414 00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:54,860 You'd be surprised, you know. Yeah. 415 00:24:55,140 --> 00:24:58,620 I mean, once they're bound and rolled, you know, sage and onion stuffing, of 416 00:24:58,620 --> 00:25:01,460 course, and lashings of thick brown gravy, smashing. 417 00:25:01,820 --> 00:25:02,820 Hey, listen. 418 00:25:02,900 --> 00:25:05,080 You're not one of them heathens that eats horse flesh, are you? 419 00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:08,980 I get it. The joke. Yeah. Roast racehorse. 420 00:25:09,340 --> 00:25:10,340 That's very good. 421 00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:14,400 Did you hear that? 422 00:25:14,620 --> 00:25:15,620 Roast racehorse. 423 00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:18,400 Come on, Diglo. 424 00:25:20,340 --> 00:25:21,340 Oh, 425 00:25:22,360 --> 00:25:23,600 my God. Rita, no. No, Rita. 426 00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:25,540 Get out, Diglo. Get out. 427 00:25:33,500 --> 00:25:34,500 Sorry, Terry. 428 00:25:38,820 --> 00:25:39,860 God, you're a terrible man. 429 00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:48,580 Right, what sort of menu do you have? 430 00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:50,800 What day is it? 431 00:25:51,420 --> 00:25:53,080 Thursday, isn't it? Oh, it's Thursday already. 432 00:25:53,420 --> 00:25:56,680 Oh, in that case, it'll be... Beef bourguignon. 433 00:25:57,060 --> 00:26:00,820 Beef bourguignon. Thursday is just the day to put the chef's hat on. 434 00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:03,360 Now, if it was really the day, it'd be egg and chips. 435 00:26:03,940 --> 00:26:05,260 It was egg and chips yesterday, wasn't it? 436 00:26:05,500 --> 00:26:07,740 Yeah. Yeah, look, I prefer the beef bourguignon. 437 00:26:08,380 --> 00:26:09,980 You're supposed to like my egg and chips. 438 00:26:10,380 --> 00:26:13,340 I've nothing against egg and chips in principle, but you see, beef 439 00:26:13,340 --> 00:26:14,340 got more protein. 440 00:26:15,180 --> 00:26:16,180 Have you got a minute, Langton? 441 00:26:16,820 --> 00:26:18,780 Oh, I'm totally committed to the Washington upcoming. 442 00:26:19,120 --> 00:26:20,120 Oh, yeah, it looks like it. 443 00:26:20,500 --> 00:26:23,320 Well, if you've finished, Rita, tune the crowd and give Joss a hand in the 444 00:26:23,320 --> 00:26:25,040 taproom. I'm going down to the village. 445 00:26:33,900 --> 00:26:34,900 Here, 446 00:26:35,540 --> 00:26:37,260 Paddy, hands with your arm. 447 00:26:38,830 --> 00:26:40,430 Have you seen this geezer? Oh, 448 00:26:41,410 --> 00:26:42,410 the phantom nobbler. 449 00:26:42,970 --> 00:26:44,950 Yeah, I've seen somebody a time or two up in them woods. 450 00:26:45,590 --> 00:26:46,590 Is that what you think it is? 451 00:26:47,130 --> 00:26:49,050 Somebody trying to nobble the honourable Gigi? 452 00:26:49,790 --> 00:26:51,230 Well, he's hardly word -watching up there. 453 00:26:51,470 --> 00:26:53,890 I listen to the rumour going around that someone's trying to get at the horse. 454 00:26:55,070 --> 00:26:57,890 And Jeremy would lose a few bob, right? If his horse was got out. 455 00:26:58,350 --> 00:27:01,030 Yeah, well, he loses his prize money. Picks 100 quid and thrusts past the 456 00:27:02,310 --> 00:27:03,350 600? Yeah. 457 00:27:03,610 --> 00:27:06,330 Oh, dear, I know. I've seen more in the pontoon kitty at the Fulham Conservative 458 00:27:06,330 --> 00:27:09,760 Club. Ah, yeah, but the cut glass decanter goes with it. 459 00:27:10,380 --> 00:27:11,380 Really? 460 00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:13,740 Must be hoping to make a killing with the bookies, then, eh? 461 00:27:14,140 --> 00:27:15,140 No, he won't do that. 462 00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:16,799 Why not? 463 00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:19,600 Well, I think he'll start off as a red -hot favourite, weigh out odds on. He's 464 00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:20,600 not worth a bet. 465 00:27:20,920 --> 00:27:21,920 That much a certainty? 466 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:23,500 Yeah, sure thing. 467 00:27:23,700 --> 00:27:26,560 All he'll have to do is to turn up a plummet on the day, and he's as good as 468 00:27:26,560 --> 00:27:27,560 the Post. 469 00:27:27,620 --> 00:27:28,700 And he'll turn up all right. 470 00:27:29,640 --> 00:27:30,640 Fit as a fiddle. 471 00:27:31,220 --> 00:27:32,220 You've got you to see to that. 472 00:27:35,020 --> 00:27:36,020 What do you say this was? 473 00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:37,200 Hmm? 474 00:27:37,610 --> 00:27:38,810 Oh, it's beef bourguignon. 475 00:27:39,790 --> 00:27:40,790 It's French. 476 00:27:41,270 --> 00:27:42,270 It's horrible. 477 00:27:42,510 --> 00:27:43,510 What? 478 00:27:45,930 --> 00:27:49,350 Hey, that's not... That's not beef bourguignon you've got there, Patrick. 479 00:27:49,350 --> 00:27:50,350 did you get that from? 480 00:27:50,390 --> 00:27:51,390 At the pan over there. 481 00:27:54,110 --> 00:27:55,470 Oh, that explains it. 482 00:27:56,470 --> 00:27:57,269 Explains what? 483 00:27:57,270 --> 00:28:00,410 Well, you see, your beef bourguignon is in the oven, and what you've got there 484 00:28:00,410 --> 00:28:03,690 is the special diet that I was heating up for the three -year -old. 485 00:28:05,210 --> 00:28:06,069 Horse food? 486 00:28:06,070 --> 00:28:07,070 Well, what's wrong with that? 487 00:28:08,330 --> 00:28:09,189 He knows food. 488 00:28:09,190 --> 00:28:11,350 Listen, there's nothing wrong with the food we give the horses. There's nothing 489 00:28:11,350 --> 00:28:12,350 in there you couldn't eat yourself. 490 00:28:12,970 --> 00:28:13,970 You sure of that? 491 00:28:14,110 --> 00:28:15,029 Sure, I'm sure. 492 00:28:15,030 --> 00:28:16,070 I make sure of it myself personally. 493 00:28:16,290 --> 00:28:21,730 It's got oats and it's got bran and it's... Well, there's just one little 494 00:28:21,730 --> 00:28:23,110 problem that you've got there, Patrick. 495 00:28:24,270 --> 00:28:27,770 What? Well, you see, the three -year -old was on a diet for constipation and 496 00:28:27,770 --> 00:28:30,890 put some jollop in there to give the horse the trots. 497 00:28:32,330 --> 00:28:34,930 So if I was here, I'd keep my klimt soles on for the rest of the day. 498 00:28:35,530 --> 00:28:36,530 You know what I mean? 499 00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:51,280 You can't have out, Terry. If it were humanly possible, you could. But I have 500 00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:52,420 given my word to Jeremy. 501 00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:56,080 But in his circle, your word is thingy, isn't it? You know, sacrosanct. 502 00:28:57,220 --> 00:28:58,380 I've eaten horse food. 503 00:28:58,980 --> 00:29:01,920 During the war, we ate all sorts of things. We ate whales. 504 00:29:02,380 --> 00:29:03,480 Even the odd snook. 505 00:29:04,540 --> 00:29:06,600 No, I'm not spending another night without horse. 506 00:29:07,220 --> 00:29:08,220 It farmed. 507 00:29:08,940 --> 00:29:13,860 We're none of us perfect, Terry. Oh, and that silly cow, she's after me. Yeah? 508 00:29:14,020 --> 00:29:16,540 Yeah. She only soaked all my clothes, didn't she? 509 00:29:17,780 --> 00:29:20,600 Really? Oh, well, you seem to be getting some fringe benefits out of it all, 510 00:29:20,660 --> 00:29:21,660 don't you? 511 00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:25,060 I'm not certain I haven't got a little visitor, either. 512 00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:28,160 If you've got fleas, you haven't got them from the horse. 513 00:29:28,460 --> 00:29:29,840 And don't go giving them to the horse. 514 00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:31,840 Or questions will be asked in the house. 515 00:29:32,900 --> 00:29:35,320 You think you've got problems. You should be where I am. 516 00:29:35,960 --> 00:29:39,040 I am where you are. Not of this immediate moment, you nurk. 517 00:29:39,340 --> 00:29:43,180 I mean, in a hot seat, wearing out shoe leather, trying to knock out milts. 518 00:29:44,650 --> 00:29:48,390 Now, if I'd been asked to keep in a proper stable with a derby runner or 519 00:29:48,390 --> 00:29:52,030 something, Plumwick Pelmet would leave me out. 520 00:29:53,130 --> 00:29:54,610 Milton? Brighton? 521 00:29:54,850 --> 00:29:57,790 I thought they'd have gone a bomb with you Yankee tourist punters. 522 00:29:58,250 --> 00:29:59,790 But they're all into royalty. 523 00:30:00,910 --> 00:30:03,210 Got no literary heritage they can call their own. 524 00:30:04,710 --> 00:30:06,970 All they want is pottery kings and queens. 525 00:30:09,150 --> 00:30:10,410 She's a pigeon fancier. 526 00:30:12,090 --> 00:30:13,090 What? 527 00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:14,539 The Queen. 528 00:30:14,540 --> 00:30:15,600 The pigeon fancier. 529 00:30:16,380 --> 00:30:17,520 Hard to believe, really, isn't it? 530 00:30:17,780 --> 00:30:21,260 No, I used to win a few fags with that in the scrubs. Used to carry around a 531 00:30:21,260 --> 00:30:22,540 clipping from titbits. 532 00:30:23,080 --> 00:30:26,520 What have pigeons got to do with it? I'm talking about American literature 533 00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:28,320 before your present 20th century. 534 00:30:29,440 --> 00:30:30,480 Mark Twain. 535 00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:32,860 Moby Dick bloke. 536 00:30:33,160 --> 00:30:34,160 Uncle Tom's cabin. 537 00:30:35,220 --> 00:30:38,140 And what's that one about the red Indian with his short back and thighs? What's 538 00:30:38,140 --> 00:30:39,140 his name? 539 00:30:39,500 --> 00:30:41,780 Geronimo? No, no, no, no, no, no. 540 00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:43,440 All guys up, though. 541 00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:46,800 Last of the... Mohegans. 542 00:30:48,500 --> 00:30:50,440 Oh, she's got class. 543 00:30:51,740 --> 00:30:52,900 Yeah, she has, as it happens. 544 00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:55,980 Really? You should see her at the gallops. 545 00:30:56,640 --> 00:30:59,800 Firm, young thighs, clasped against the horse's flanks. 546 00:31:00,260 --> 00:31:01,260 Holding it back. 547 00:31:03,340 --> 00:31:05,280 Didn't get that bit of purple prose, did you? 548 00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:09,460 You haven't been given it one, have you? 549 00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:16,140 Nah, all I get from her is double blanks. It's that other silly moo I'm 550 00:31:16,140 --> 00:31:18,620 off, trying to buy my body with mugs of cocoa. 551 00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:21,360 You could travel farther and fare worse, Terry. 552 00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:25,980 Well, she must have better manners in the kit than your four -legged friend. 553 00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:27,700 I'll leave it out after. 554 00:31:29,620 --> 00:31:32,620 That'll be one for your memoirs, Terry. You'll get a result there. 555 00:31:34,980 --> 00:31:36,060 Oh, well, breath on. 556 00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:39,060 I might have recourse to going back to town. 557 00:31:39,700 --> 00:31:41,500 England? Yeah, London, yeah. 558 00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:43,020 I've been considering the feasibility. 559 00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:45,980 I mean, the milk's not doing the hot cake back down here. I might just want 560 00:31:45,980 --> 00:31:47,120 chase my contacts up west. 561 00:31:47,720 --> 00:31:49,340 Well, it suits me. I've had a belly full of this. 562 00:31:49,620 --> 00:31:50,620 Oh, no, no, not you. 563 00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:53,740 I have given Jeremy my word that you will see this job through. 564 00:31:54,000 --> 00:31:55,700 And I am a man of my word. 565 00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:57,620 And you are a man of my word, too. 566 00:31:58,240 --> 00:31:59,260 Anyway, I'll keep in touch. 567 00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:00,480 Oh, she wants you. 568 00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:38,160 I'll be the Coco Queen. 569 00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:26,180 Grab that finger, sir. 570 00:33:28,580 --> 00:33:29,700 Get the other bugger down. 571 00:33:30,020 --> 00:33:31,080 Near the table first. 572 00:33:31,500 --> 00:33:32,500 Move it. 573 00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:41,360 What the hell happened? 574 00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:43,680 I had a visitor. He had a gun. 575 00:33:43,900 --> 00:33:45,380 Get a look at him. Do you recognize the lunatic? 576 00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:47,280 No. I'll know next time. 577 00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:24,239 Enjoy the race, Patrick. 578 00:34:25,219 --> 00:34:26,219 You're not going? 579 00:34:26,639 --> 00:34:27,639 Somebody has to mind the shop. 580 00:34:29,300 --> 00:34:30,300 Anyway, 581 00:34:30,620 --> 00:34:31,900 I'm not missing much. 582 00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:34,960 Hey, I'll tell you something. 583 00:34:35,400 --> 00:34:36,400 She leads from the start. 584 00:34:36,620 --> 00:34:38,639 And all the rest of the material will be the back of her bum. 585 00:34:40,540 --> 00:34:41,540 Mr. McCann! 586 00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:44,400 Yeah, well, tell her I'll find him, mate. I'll see you, eh? Look after 587 00:34:44,560 --> 00:34:45,560 God bless, Patrick. 588 00:34:45,780 --> 00:34:46,780 Hey! 589 00:34:47,239 --> 00:34:48,300 Keep taking the horse tablets. 590 00:34:52,060 --> 00:34:52,988 Come on. 591 00:34:52,989 --> 00:34:53,989 Ten o 'clock already. 592 00:34:54,130 --> 00:34:56,790 I want to get in there and settle down a couple of hours before the office. 593 00:35:12,850 --> 00:35:14,690 Let him down just before you see the steward. 594 00:35:15,110 --> 00:35:16,510 Where the hell's Rita got to? 595 00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:34,360 Drop the time on you, Terry. 596 00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:36,080 Yes, thanks. 597 00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:38,540 Would you mind telling me? I've got a watch, but I haven't got it on. 598 00:35:39,300 --> 00:35:40,300 Just gone 12. 599 00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:41,800 It's at the Menders. 600 00:35:42,620 --> 00:35:43,620 Getting mended. 601 00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:46,420 You on your own? You waiting for somebody? 602 00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:47,880 Yeah, something like that. 603 00:35:48,340 --> 00:35:49,400 Haven't you got things to do? 604 00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:52,600 Joc will see her into the stable. She doesn't run until the 2 .15. 605 00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:54,820 Only if you are on your own. 606 00:35:55,400 --> 00:35:56,400 I'm on my own. 607 00:35:56,760 --> 00:35:59,140 So I'll wait for the gates to open. You could buy me a drink. 608 00:36:00,880 --> 00:36:02,520 Or on the other hand, I could buy you a drink. 609 00:36:10,020 --> 00:36:12,600 Sorry, Reek. Got to see a man about horse. See you later. 610 00:36:13,240 --> 00:36:14,240 Be lucky. 611 00:36:20,720 --> 00:36:22,160 Never another job like that one. 612 00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:23,480 Hello, young lover. 613 00:36:23,780 --> 00:36:25,060 Not playing Goodsbury, am I? 614 00:36:25,440 --> 00:36:26,440 Open the boot. 615 00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:28,760 Look at that. 616 00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:30,680 That's a bit tawdry, isn't it? 617 00:36:31,740 --> 00:36:33,100 Stone me, that's it. Pardon? 618 00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:35,560 A geezer who tried to bonfire me. 619 00:37:06,120 --> 00:37:07,220 Thank you. 620 00:37:52,430 --> 00:37:56,630 you dare, and I'll do more than say of something. I'll have you put away again, 621 00:37:56,770 --> 00:37:57,609 my lad. 622 00:37:57,610 --> 00:37:58,610 Hold thy tongue, woman! 623 00:37:59,030 --> 00:38:03,210 Thou art shapen in wickedness, and in sin hath thy mother conceived thee. 624 00:38:03,450 --> 00:38:04,450 Build off! 625 00:38:07,790 --> 00:38:08,990 Is that a friend of yours? 626 00:38:09,210 --> 00:38:10,430 He's no friend of mine. 627 00:38:10,650 --> 00:38:11,830 You're on a bleeding switch. 628 00:38:12,030 --> 00:38:15,650 I know. I must have been off mine when I married that dast dozy sod. 629 00:38:16,310 --> 00:38:17,930 Generation of vipers! 630 00:38:19,930 --> 00:38:23,900 Who are you? I warn thee from the wrath to come. Shut your gob. 631 00:38:24,620 --> 00:38:26,020 Can't you leave me alone? 632 00:38:26,420 --> 00:38:31,720 Can't you let me live my life? I wouldn't care. I've been separated from 633 00:38:31,720 --> 00:38:33,620 years. We've been divorced ten months. 634 00:38:34,020 --> 00:38:38,800 I knew it was you. I knew all along. And you tried to give me some. 635 00:38:39,080 --> 00:38:41,440 I've got a quarter older on him from a lesson. 636 00:38:41,740 --> 00:38:44,940 You know you'll suffer for it in the long run. Why can't you? 637 00:38:50,830 --> 00:38:51,930 and the bloody end. 638 00:38:52,210 --> 00:38:58,030 He follows me round the country and a right good living job at a riding 639 00:38:58,030 --> 00:39:02,370 near Eddon Bridge run by a married gentleman with a son at university. 640 00:39:02,670 --> 00:39:03,810 A Rotarian. 641 00:39:23,530 --> 00:39:27,930 morning when a couple of religious maniacs kept him talking on the door. 642 00:40:12,910 --> 00:40:14,890 Well, as the man said, it takes all sorts. 643 00:40:15,110 --> 00:40:18,590 Very astutely put, my son. But if we're going to stand here philosophising all 644 00:40:18,590 --> 00:40:20,930 afternoon, we're not going to earn our wages, are we? Come on. 645 00:40:23,570 --> 00:40:23,970 Number 646 00:40:23,970 --> 00:40:32,810 three, 647 00:40:38,370 --> 00:40:39,370 permit, 648 00:40:40,190 --> 00:40:42,070 Miss Maxwell Saunders. 649 00:40:42,860 --> 00:40:44,160 Grey and gold. 650 00:40:44,940 --> 00:40:46,180 Any extras to declare? 651 00:40:46,420 --> 00:40:47,319 No extras. 652 00:40:47,320 --> 00:40:48,320 Allowance, three pounds. 653 00:40:48,680 --> 00:40:51,460 Saving three pounds. 654 00:40:52,640 --> 00:40:53,640 And it's just. 655 00:40:54,980 --> 00:40:56,260 Go and get a cup of tea. 656 00:40:57,840 --> 00:40:58,840 Next. 657 00:41:41,900 --> 00:41:42,859 You know, my son, one ton. 658 00:41:42,860 --> 00:41:44,200 Put yourself about, see what you can get. 659 00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:45,598 A hundred? 660 00:41:45,600 --> 00:41:46,600 Yeah. 661 00:41:46,680 --> 00:41:49,220 It's going to be no price, is it? It's bound to be odds on. 662 00:41:49,540 --> 00:41:50,840 And I could all catch a sprat then, innit? 663 00:41:51,520 --> 00:41:54,240 Look, I have it from the horse's mouth. It's the biggest certainty since the 664 00:41:54,240 --> 00:41:56,820 tortoise walloped the air. And catching a sprat's better than bugger all. 665 00:41:58,500 --> 00:41:59,500 Well, go on, chill out. 666 00:42:00,660 --> 00:42:01,900 What's your last servant dial? 667 00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:04,000 Enlarged arteries. 668 00:42:07,760 --> 00:42:08,760 Excuse me. 669 00:42:21,390 --> 00:42:26,230 Here we go. Yes, sunshine. 670 00:42:27,390 --> 00:42:28,910 £120. £120. 671 00:42:29,690 --> 00:42:31,050 £734. £734. 672 00:43:00,950 --> 00:43:01,950 There you go. 673 00:43:02,130 --> 00:43:03,130 Five to one on. 674 00:43:03,610 --> 00:43:04,630 Five to one on? 675 00:43:05,090 --> 00:43:07,550 A hundred nigger to twenty. Is that the best you could get? Yes. 676 00:43:08,270 --> 00:43:09,249 Do it yourself? 677 00:43:09,250 --> 00:43:10,790 Nah. Never do odds -on shots. 678 00:43:11,430 --> 00:43:14,310 So I walk away with twenty quid. That can't be bad. Minus tax. 679 00:43:15,190 --> 00:43:16,190 No, 680 00:43:16,830 --> 00:43:17,830 I never have done odds -ons. 681 00:43:18,710 --> 00:43:21,070 In any case... They'll soon be calling the line. 682 00:43:22,090 --> 00:43:23,290 In any case what, Tony? 683 00:43:42,839 --> 00:43:43,839 What, Terry? 684 00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:50,220 If coma is such a good thing, how come I saw your oppo, Jeremy, putting all his 685 00:43:50,220 --> 00:43:52,340 dough on the second favourite, Linda's lunch? 686 00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:55,960 Linda's lunch? Yeah, six to one, not a bad price, that, is it? 687 00:44:23,210 --> 00:44:24,210 He needed his rider. 688 00:44:24,230 --> 00:44:25,230 She got off. 689 00:44:25,990 --> 00:44:26,990 Come on, Linda. 690 00:44:27,390 --> 00:44:28,410 Come on, my beauty. 691 00:44:28,610 --> 00:44:29,610 What you on about? 692 00:44:31,850 --> 00:44:33,290 Go on, my son. Kick her on. 693 00:44:35,130 --> 00:44:42,110 I never fancied that pelmet 694 00:44:42,110 --> 00:44:45,650 anyway. Even before I saw this warm chick putting all his loot on a second 695 00:44:45,650 --> 00:44:47,190 favourite. Just never fancied it. 696 00:44:47,430 --> 00:44:48,430 Why not? 697 00:44:49,430 --> 00:44:50,430 Feeling in me, Walter. 698 00:44:51,050 --> 00:44:52,190 You might have told me. 699 00:44:52,600 --> 00:44:53,319 What for? 700 00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:54,440 Wouldn't have done any good, would it? 701 00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:55,680 You're Walsh's name, aren't you? 702 00:44:56,420 --> 00:44:57,420 Implacable. 703 00:44:59,980 --> 00:45:00,980 Here's another thing. 704 00:45:01,420 --> 00:45:02,420 What? 705 00:45:02,500 --> 00:45:05,580 All that stuff you were giving me before the off about it being the greatest 706 00:45:05,580 --> 00:45:08,420 racing certainty since the talk was well up the air. What about it? 707 00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:10,840 Historically inaccurate, innit? 708 00:45:11,480 --> 00:45:14,380 Before the start of that race, the air was not your favourite, was it? 709 00:45:16,060 --> 00:45:18,880 Amazing. Who do you think you are? Bleeding Eshop? 710 00:45:19,340 --> 00:45:20,360 Oh, dear. 711 00:45:24,919 --> 00:45:26,420 Oi! Jeremy, you bastard. 712 00:45:26,780 --> 00:45:28,120 You had that race rigged. 713 00:45:28,640 --> 00:45:29,900 Wow, sir, as if I would. 714 00:45:31,240 --> 00:45:33,240 Justin's foot slipped out of the iron, that's all. 715 00:45:33,500 --> 00:45:35,760 Leave it out. She took a dive. I had her in me bins. 716 00:45:36,020 --> 00:45:38,680 You might have robed me in. You did owe me a favour. I lent you Terry. 717 00:45:38,960 --> 00:45:40,100 Oh, I would have helped you. 718 00:45:40,340 --> 00:45:43,400 But one has to be discreet if one wants to keep the odds out on the second 719 00:45:43,400 --> 00:45:44,400 favourite. 720 00:45:44,660 --> 00:45:46,180 How'd you get that bird to sling it, eh? 721 00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:47,420 Break her arm or something? 722 00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:49,200 Hello, darling. 723 00:45:54,290 --> 00:45:55,710 Dear, oh dear, Terry. 724 00:45:56,210 --> 00:45:57,490 What is it all about, eh? 725 00:45:58,410 --> 00:45:59,410 Contact, isn't it? 726 00:46:02,210 --> 00:46:04,250 Sorry I couldn't help you push the Miltons, Arthur. 727 00:46:04,930 --> 00:46:07,070 Give us a ring if ever I can give you any help again. 728 00:46:08,210 --> 00:46:09,210 No, no, no, Terry. 729 00:46:10,050 --> 00:46:11,050 Yeah, go on. 730 00:46:11,250 --> 00:46:12,250 There's a copper. 731 00:46:16,670 --> 00:46:19,270 No, I never had her card marked as being dodgy, I must say. 732 00:46:19,770 --> 00:46:20,609 And it? 733 00:46:20,610 --> 00:46:21,870 Well, he was definitely bent. 734 00:46:22,110 --> 00:46:23,110 He was bent. 735 00:46:23,790 --> 00:46:24,769 Oh, yeah. 736 00:46:24,770 --> 00:46:25,770 Been crooked. 737 00:46:25,990 --> 00:46:29,510 I thought we'd spent peculiar, you know. We didn't study the form, Terry, did 738 00:46:29,510 --> 00:46:32,690 we? Ah, and your favourite finished well down the field, didn't he? 739 00:46:33,570 --> 00:46:35,130 What don't a field be lost? 740 00:46:35,690 --> 00:46:36,910 All is not lost. 741 00:46:37,150 --> 00:46:43,130 The unconquerable will, the study of revenge, er, et cetera, et cetera. 742 00:46:43,910 --> 00:46:44,910 Milton? 743 00:46:45,130 --> 00:46:46,130 The lad himself. 744 00:46:46,990 --> 00:46:49,790 Null desperandum, that's what I think he's trying to tell us, Terry. Cop that. 745 00:46:51,930 --> 00:46:52,930 It's a paintbrush. 746 00:46:53,160 --> 00:46:54,240 That is your starter for ten. 747 00:46:54,720 --> 00:46:57,780 This is a pot of blue paint, this is a pot of white paint. I want them all 748 00:46:57,780 --> 00:47:01,080 painted. Blue shirts, blue breeches, white socks, nice pair of boots. 749 00:47:02,380 --> 00:47:03,380 Do what? 750 00:47:04,140 --> 00:47:06,120 I have another contact in commemorative pottery. 751 00:47:06,640 --> 00:47:07,640 No, no, no, be honest. 752 00:47:07,860 --> 00:47:10,780 I've got a mate who's got a souvenir shop not far from Stamford Bridge. 753 00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:14,240 I'll stand a loss, but you'll knock him out for me as Chelsea footballers. 754 00:47:17,440 --> 00:47:18,440 Let him fit out. 755 00:47:19,300 --> 00:47:21,660 He can't do that, he's a famous antique poet. 756 00:47:22,240 --> 00:47:23,240 He's got a book in his hand. 757 00:47:24,860 --> 00:47:25,880 FAM book, isn't it? 758 00:47:26,240 --> 00:47:27,260 He's wearing a cloak. 759 00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:29,500 Oh, paint it. Stick a number on the back. 760 00:47:29,780 --> 00:47:32,240 Don't argue with me, Terry. Exercise your artistic talent. 761 00:47:32,820 --> 00:47:33,820 Here. 762 00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:35,360 You have the blue. 763 00:47:38,820 --> 00:47:39,880 Here's another one for you. 764 00:47:40,600 --> 00:47:43,100 I live in Gaza at a mill with slaves. 765 00:47:43,660 --> 00:47:44,660 Samson Agonistes. 766 00:47:48,200 --> 00:47:49,200 I've got one for you. 767 00:47:49,600 --> 00:47:50,600 Oh? 768 00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:54,680 When the ball hit the back of the net, I was over the moon, Brian. 769 00:47:56,040 --> 00:47:57,040 Kevin Keegan. 770 00:47:59,380 --> 00:48:01,700 I think you're an inside forward, my son. 771 00:48:22,060 --> 00:48:24,920 I've changed the situation. 772 00:48:28,680 --> 00:48:32,920 Right people, right time, just the wrong location. 773 00:48:36,720 --> 00:48:38,940 I've got a good idea. 774 00:48:40,740 --> 00:48:47,120 Just you keep me near. I'll be so good for you. I could be so good for you. 775 00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:51,240 I'm going to help you. Love you like you want me to. 776 00:48:58,060 --> 00:48:59,060 Peace out.